2 year olds don't get sarcasm

Morgan has been testing the boundaries of acceptable behavior recently and we've both been trying to keep our cool and stay consistent, but when she screamed at the top of her lungs after leaving the doctor's office today I found myself getting frustrated. It was one of those moments when I understood why some people take out their frustrations on other people. Not to toot my own horn, but a lesser man would have snapped and crashed into a pole hoping the unconsciousness would be a break from the screaming. All she wanted was "Mommy" but Mommy was back at the doctor's with Eliza where Morgan had not followed instructions to stay away from the exam table so we had left.

Its maybe a 10-12 minute drive and she was at full volume the whole way. I tried asking, whispering, hinting, reasoning, reverse psychology (Scream louder Morgan, louder!) and finally sarcasm. Funny thing, it didn't work. She used every tear and every bit of volume her little lungs could muster and then, as if flipping a switch, we pulled into the driveway and she just stopped. We got down from the car and she wandered into the house as if nothing happened.

Earlier this evening she was in one of her moods following another bi-polar episode. We were all at the table and just started eating when she said, "May I be excused please?" adorable right? Then after being told she may not, she cried, faked a bathroom run and then melted down again. With Kim needing to eat before putting Eliza down it fell upon me to corral the flimsy crier and either punish her with a bath and bed time an hour early or convince her to return to the table. Much like a scene from a horror movie, it was while I was holding her over the bath water that she broke down and agreed to return to the table and eat.

Add to this day the usual bath time panic and wiggling, the almost tortuous teeth brushing and then calming her enough to comb her hair before bed. Groan.

Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.